Seeing Dad in a Whole New Light

I found out some pretty surprising news on June 27th, 2012. However, for perspective, let's go back to November 30th, 1976. On that day a baby girl was born to Robert & Carolyn Jenkinson on their wedding anniversary. Adorned with bright eyes and a giant smile. She immediately stole her father's heart, and he then made an amazing committment to her. A secret was made.

Yes, that little girl was me, Lori Leigh Jenkinson. It seemed from that day forward, I was always close to my father. Daddy's little girl as the saying goes. My Dad taught me so many things throughout the years. Even after my Mother left the family when I was in junior high school, he continued to be an amazing father, and went above and beyond to take care of me. He would field questions with style & grace about puberty that probably should have been for my mother. His dedication was pretty amazing, but I still had no idea how amazing...

I used to give him Mother's & Father's Day gifts because he acted as both to me. In his family, love wasn't as openly given as it was on my Mother's side. In hindsight, I never totally understood that, but I always threw my arms around him and hugged him. I would tell him I loved him pretty much daily. I even said I love you before I left for work on the day he died. My father passed away February 23rd, 2005, and I really can't believe 7 years has passed since then.

So, flashing back to current day, I have now found out that the only father I ever knew was not my biological father. My mother had an affair with a man whose name is still to be determined, and I was the result of her choice. I'm still not sure as to whether or not I will ever contact this man. If I do it would be only from a medical standpoint, or to find out if I have any cool siblings that would be interested in meeting. The only thing I can seem to focus on now is the amazing man that my father was. He never had to raise me, or show me the kind of love that he did. Sure, we had our fights and troubles just like any parent/child relationship, but now learning that he really didn't have to do any of it just makes my Dad even more amazing in my eyes. It takes a really special man to do what my father did. He did what he could to try and make it work with my Mom, but I think many factors were against them like alcohol and getting married so young. I know relationships are difficult and I can't even imagine being married to this day. I'm not angry at my parents for going their own ways. I'd much rather have people do the things that makes them happy & find someone that lifts them up. I don't think my parents did that for each other. I do know my father & I lifted each other up. We would spend holidays together, just him & I, and it was great. I'd make us food and we'd watch TV or talk. I'm really glad I was able to spend so much time with him. I was glad to be able to take care of him when he got sick, bandaging his foot, helping him to dialysis, and cooking special meals for his changes in diet. I am so glad that I was able to help him even just a little considering how much he helped me over the years.

I've been asked if I would have changed anything about the past, and I don't think I would. Sure, I would have liked to know this information sooner, but learning it now just inspires me to want to continue to be a good person. I want to keep showing people the amazing type of love I was shown. I want to continue to make him proud as he looks over me from heaven. Learning the truth sure has been a roller coaster of emotions, but I am left with the feeling of love. Pure, unconditional love which I thought was only possible by animals. My father has shown me that unconditional love is possible in human form. He continues to teach me lessons even after he is gone. I feel truly blessed and honored to have been welcomed by him & his family from day one. This is one amazing family that I am part of, and I feel so thankful to be a part of it.